October 2001 Archives

(17:00)


...but need hug.


Today was an odd day at work for me, because I didn't listen to ANY music at all.


Not feel like talking much...wasted all my energy in Angband Room.
:-)
("5 o'clock in the afternoon breathes inertia. You die. You feel yourself moving slower!")

(17:35)


But don't worry.


This is Damien.


Weblog bloat is my bread and peanut butter.


(Out of jelly, need food-shop going)


Besides...need to wrench myself away from the Angband room. But when other people share stuff that I like to do, I find that joy completely impossible to ignore.

(16:25)


It's a good day. My mood isn't at maximum...but life is still okay.

Musicwise...I'm up to 15 mp3 recordings of my piano playing. (Kass is my #1 distributor) I still have to convince myself to start RealJukebox recording whenever I sit down for an improv session at my piano, though.



Womanwise...wait...forgot...don't customarily talk about women on here. Hehe...never mind.
Very intelligent. You looked for hidden text. But I'm not gonna sing, see?! :-P

Here...for a laugh, Check this out. I don't think I'd ever try to set my sisters up with anyone...(mainly because that would be kinda like serving mineral water to a fish....)


Well...gonna sit here at work like a dolt for a bit longer, then go home. Hope y'all's having a good day. Buffy misses you all...since you never write.

(17:20)


It is better to have visited Disneyworld and left than never to have visited at all.

It is better to have drunk and peed than to have gone thirsty.

It is better to have bought a Playstation and then replaced it with a Playstation 2 two months later than to go for two months without playing Playstation games.

It is better to have your own car that breaks down in a month than to be trapped in the house during spring break.

Add your own!! :-)

(12:05)


It's like...as I sit down at my computer, and contemplate what to write in my weblog...I have SOOOO much to say that I can say nothing at all. (The image that comes to mind is when a crowd of people are trying to leave a building at one time, and they all try to push out together and get crammed in the doorway. Those are my thoughts trying to come out through my fingers!)

So, like, life is pretty decent. It's my day today weatherwise. I always get at least one day per year, and today, October 12, is it. It's nice and cool, the sky is a rich blue, dotted with cirrocumulus clouds, birds flying back and forth, the first hints of changing leaves.

---

A Visitor

(12:10)

My Dad stopped by my apartment unexpectedly on Tuesday. It was a very nice visit. Was the first time he saw the place, which he called "a dump." (My father has a childlike manner of appraisal. Not that it's puerile or of limited scope, but it consists of a winsome and simple delivery of the blunt truth. Y'see, Some folks, like me, do a lot of thinking to try to varnish what they say so that other people can take it more easily. My Dad, on the other hand, prefers to deliver his thoughts raw and let the recipient do the thinking on how to take them. To know him is to love him.) We talked for a bit on why it is that I've been undercover for the last few days/weeks...and it felt good to discuss.

---

Speaking of Which...

(12:20)


I think I'm going to make a final stab to be rid of depression, or at least to keep it from killing my outlook on life. This time, no drugs. (Many of my friends/family disagree with my no-medication tactic...but I have to do it this way, for me.) I just have to stop my brain dead in its tracks whenever it starts keeping me from doing things that I know I have to do.

---

Latest Musical Endeavors

(12:25)


Tonight I play in a recital. Accompanying a tenor in his solo voice recital. We'll do very well, I can tell. My playing will be okay-to-goodish, considering that I only received the music two weeks ago. (I wish someone were recording it.)

Also, I have to record my piano reduction of "Cid's Theme" from FF7, and then start working on writing up a few more. I need a binder in which to keep these, and I also need to start beautifying the scores so that they're made for READING rather than for computer playback. (Like...write each rolled chord as a chord with a squiggly line by it, rather than as a sequence of really fast tied notes)

And it's competition season soon. My piano teacher is already beginning to enlist my accompaniment skills for more concertos. I might even be able to work with some of her collegiate studetns.

And I'm thinking of creating a whole series of Haydn Sonata recordings....of better quality than that psycho piece o' dung I already recorded.

SO MUCH TO DO, and so much time!!!

---

Who Wants to Be A Punk?

(12:35)


This Tuesday was the first time Damien used his Playstation 2 to _________ .

a) Play Playstation 1 games	c) Play DVDs
b) Play Playstation 2 games	d) Make medium-rare Quadloin steak

Which of the following movies does Damien own on DVD?

a) Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom	c) Clueless
b) Disney's Robin Hood	d) ATDP: Men in Tights

(17:50)


And not just like a cousin or a best friend...I mean, I want to bear its children.

Ahhhhh....so many characters, so many moves, so much funn....

---

Don't Expect This To Be A Precedent, But...

(17:51)


The answer to both of Friday's questions was (b).

(13:10)


And sometimes it's not windy enough...

And sometimes the clouds are too sparse...

And sometimes it's a bit too humid....

But that doesn't mean that it's not perfect.

---

Bad call

(13:12)


Fun as it is to talk on the phone in lieu of sleeping, I don't advise any of you to be up until 4 AM on a day when you have to work or go to school the next day. (This doesn't count for people like Quadzlqzp, Lord of Fish, who doesn't have classes until like 3 PM. You can stay awake as long as you like. Besides, if you retire too early, who'll chase away the other sleep-procrastinators of the world?)

---

How long will it last?

(13:15)


I'm resolved to start doing this log thing daily. Enough with the sporadica.

I'm not sure if I'm going to do anything with the doglog though. No public interest. Life goes on.

(23:15) <=== See? Plenty of time


Things to do tomorrow (or in the very near future):

• Go to work


• Learn to say NO without making excuses


• Buy antifreeze


• Go to Dad's house


• Do laundry


• Go to sleep no later than 11


• Get a better score in Tekken Bowl (Man, Kuma's not much for bowling....throws too hard)


• Cancel this weekend's piano lesson so I can go visit Rob


• Contact my landlord about renewing my lease so I'm not homeless in a month


• Use the word scintillating (another word taught to me by Angband) in a sentence

(9:00)


I like that phrase, because it's ambiguous by design.


And I said it this morning as I threw out some overripe bananas that seem to have been discovered by a coupla fruit flies.


And here's what a dork I am...I look at them and see


I II


and I feel the need to stomp them out quickly lest my kitchen start to look like



I I III I II III I

I I II I I II II I

 I I IIII I II I I

II  I I I    I I I


Thanks, Angband. >:-|

---

My least favorite thing in the whole world

(11:45)


Uncertainty.


I'd rather face a definite bleak certainty rather than not understand what's going on. In most cases.


But when I'm not sure of what's going on, or where I'm going, or whether I can believe what someone says because they've betrayed my trust.....it's like...that's as distraught as Damien gets.


This is why I'm quick to distance myself from things that I don't understand, or people that I cannot trust.


I am not yet prepared to discuss on my weblog the relevance of all this. Ask, and I'll probably tell you.

---

Raid

(11:50)


(HARSHNESS WARNING. Free your mind before reading on.)
If you're prone to stubbornness or closedmindedness, skip this update.


It's like...every time I look at that can of Raid with the ant being struck by lightning or whatever....I think about how much a bug infestation in my apartment resembles the ongoing human infestation of God's planet....


No no no. I'm not going to become an insane misanthropist. This is just one thought I have. And one thought doesn't define a person.


But it's like...there are resources around...we use them for our benefit, and they have ALL been given to us by God. And all that he asks is that we live by his rules. We're in his house...so live by his rules. And he even understands that not a one of us is actually going to DO it. But...the DEGREE to which we don't do it...and then deny his existence...Why doesn't he just take out a big can of Raid that Kills People Dead and Keeps On Killing...and just spray the whole planet??


Folks say "If there is such a loving God, why does he allow so much bad crap to happen." I say...what do you think we deserve??


Is it any different from the ants that take the food that YOU want for YOURSELF and pay NO HEED to your existence or the fact that their continued life in your home is only because you're letting them stay? You can be RIGHT THERE in the way, and the ants will crawl over you or around you. Because you're not a part of THEIR PLAN, you're of no consequence to them, even though they're in YOUR HOUSE.


I think that part of the reason God hasn't stamped us out yet is that he doesn't have to. If he gives us enough time, we'll stamp ourselves out.


Unless I can become the queen ant in some way....

---

Whoa.

(15:50)


This weblog's pretty heavy. I apologize if you threw your back out reading it.

(13:00)


Oh well...at least my weblog updating is denser than it once was. Hopefully I'll get back to flipping for a solid week. (To think...in order to be part of the Spark Elite back when I first made a weblog...I had to do that. And I did somehow.)


Times change, I suppose.

---

What if it were really Quad?

(13:01)


It would be kinda funny if Quad were really associated with all the many things in life that are named after him?


Like...the Quadharpy from Final Fantasy V...(A particularly dangerous enemy...when you first encounter them, you are not strong enough to handle them and you MUST flee.) Can you imagine how dangerous it would be if it also played the violin???


And Quadlilocks...from the classic fairy tale...imagine this dialogue:


Little Bear: dude

Little Bear: you're sleeping in my bed!! O_o

Quadlilocks: yup ;)

Quadlilocks: not like you ever use it ;)

Little Bear: LOL

Little Bear: What are you talking about

Little Bear: I've used it for at least 8 hours this week!

Quadlilocks: It's Friday ;)

Little Bear: ohhh yeahh ^_^

Little Bear: well

Little Bear: mooooooo

Quadlilocks: hehe ;)

Jo Mama Bear: Get out of his bed before I represent, grizzly style.


And then there's the Quad City DJ's...what if they made a song called "C'mon Ride It(The BART)"?? (Someone ELSE can speculate about the lyrics...)


And there's the Quadthulg from Angband...


The Quadthulg winks at you and giggles.

Your mind is blasted with punkonic energy!

You feel yourself moving slower.

You are laughing uncontrollably.

You miss the Quadthulg.

You miss the Quadthulg.

You miss the Quadthulg.

You miss the Quadthulg.

The Quadthulg teleports you away.

You crawl out of bed...

And there's the geometrical concept of the Quadrilateral.

 _______

|       \

|        \

|         \

|          \

 \          \     "Yeah, I have four sides. I just

  \        /     happen to have one MORE

   \      /      as well. ;)"

    \    /

     \  /

      \/



I can only imagine what a world it would be...

---

Bah, gonna miss more days.

(13:25)


Going to be away this weekend. I guess life goes on!

(11:45)


But am I SURE I want to flip? [OK]


How y'all doin'?
Me? I been better, I s'pose.